so I’m sitting there, barbecue sauce on my female presenting nipples…
(via cartoonsarefornerds)
Aesthetic
Positivity Only
reblog to add +10 haunting power to your ghost when you die
i aint risking being a weak ass ghost
Reblog for a +2 to visibility to cats when nothing else can see you
(via alcesanonymoose)
The holiday season is coming up and if you’re being rude to a retail worker while they’re pulling off a 12+ hour shift cause it’s a holiday, you’re going directly to hell and i’m sending you there myself.
(via iampikachuhearmeroar)
The signs as Panic! At the Disco songs
Aries: Don’t Threaten Me with a Good Time
Taurus: Death of a Bachelor
Gemini: Roaring 20s
Cancer: The Good, the Bad and the Dirty
Leo: High Hopes
Virgo: This is Gospel
Libra: Say Amen (Saturday Night)
Scorpio: Emperor’s New Clothes
Sagittarius: I Write Sins Not Tragedies
Capricorn: Hey Look Ma, I Made It
Aquarius: Dancing’s Not a Crime
Pisces: Girls/Girls/Boys
Jolene by Dolly Parton except it’s playing downstairs while you’re laying up in the loft of a cabin listening to the thunder and rain hitting the roof tiles above you
(via setheverman)
when i was a kid, i thought shonen heroes kind of overdid the “friendship is important” thing, but now that i’ve grown up i find myself tearing up and my heart grows three sizes sometimes when my friends call me by pet names or just do the smallest stuff for me like printing things and like… I’m sorry I doubted you naruto you were right all along my friends ARE my heart
(via sarcasticpistachios)
*uses my thumbs to lift my bra straps like an old timey political man would with his suspenders* im the mayor of titty city, bitch
(via widzi)
I’m here to align my chakras and fuck your girl and I just became one with the universe motherfucker
(via widzi)
I am a:
⚪️man
⚪️woman
🔘 entity beyond your comprehension
Seeking:
⚪️men
⚪️women
🔘 the ability to remove sentience
(via thecommonchick)
i identify as a bottle of red wine smashed on the tile floor of a grocery store
(via thecommonchick)
“i don’t wanna die, i sometimes wish i’d never been born at all” remains the rawest fucking lyric in the history of music thanks freddie
(via deviouslydeplorable)
1 a.m. tarot reading
Me: *asks super deep question*
Tarot deck: fuckin go to bed dude